A woman was a remote worker, living with her parents-in-law so she and her husband could take care of ailing her father-in-law and do household chores without help. Eventually, she announced a life-changing decision.A Reddit user turned to others to find out what she should do because she was experiencing issues living at her parents-in-law’s house, where she was far away from her family and friends.
She and her husband had moved into the house when her father-in-law fell ill. He needed care, and the woman and her husband agreed to move in and help her parents-in-law with everything.However, when the woman made the post, she had become angry at how her parents-in-law and her husband were treating her, so she turned to others on the platform to find out if she was overreacting.
What Happened Between the Woman and Her Husband’s Family?
Although she and her husband had moved in to care for her father-in-law while he was very ill, the woman said her father was better, and there were only a few things that he still needed help with. She then explained her roles in the house.
The woman and her husband paid for groceries, electricity, and TV packages. The mortgage-free house was also the woman’s responsibility. She had to cook and clean for the family. The woman also arranged and transported all the household pets to their veterinary appointments.
Along with everything else she and her husband paid for, the woman and her husband paid half of any household upgrades or improvements as his parents planned to leave the house to them in the future.While the arrangement worked for a while, the woman started feeling resentful that her parents-in-law and husband came home from work and could relax while she was expected to do all the household chores. She felt like a live-in maid.Everything blew up one day when the woman was ill. She had been doing everything for her family for a while when she shared that she had fallen sick. She lamented:
“I felt the [worst] I’ve ever felt and wanted nothing more than to sleep; however, once it got around to dinner time, I was woken by my MIL to ask when I was getting up to make dinner.”Not wanting to start an argument, the woman got up and made dinner. Her family watched a movie as she prepared their meal. When she was alone with her husband, she brought up her concerns. He told her he was sorry and that he would help her more.
However, the next day, the exact same thing happened, with the woman having to cook a full dinner while her family relaxed. Her mother-in-law then asked her to do extra cleaning in the common areas so the rest of the family wouldn’t fall ill.
The woman was horrified and said the only reason she was even in the common areas was because they had dragged her out of her room to come and cook for them and clean the areas.Although the woman’s husband said nothing while she and his mother were talking, he later told her she had brought things up incorrectly and she should have spoken when she was calmer. She asked Reddit users what to do, and many advised her that she should leave that house, and some even advised that she should leave her husband.
What Happened Next?
Three months after her initial post, the woman posted an update for everybody who had asked for one. After the initial post, the woman transferred her wages into her private account and removed her savings from her and her husband’s joint savings account.She shared that it was one of her best decisions, as she found out two weeks after her first post that she was pregnant. Her pregnancy was a catalyst for everything that came next because of her parents-in-law’s behavior.
Soon after confirming that everything was okay with her baby, the woman’s parents-in-law began suggesting names, and her mother-in-law said she would go into early retirement so she could raise the baby. This upset the woman as she didn’t want anybody else to raise her child.
Her in-laws also began suggesting colors and designs for the nursery but never asked the woman for her opinion. She shared:
“I felt as though I was just an incubator.”
The final straw came when the woman went shopping for baby items, and her mother-in-law continually told her that each item she picked up was wrong. One outfit she chose was gender-neutral, but her mother-in-law told her it was not gender-neutral enough for a boy to wear. The woman’s mother-in-law also said the whole family hoped for a boy.
The woman said she was upset that what would have been her first baby purchase was ruined by her mother-in-law. She decided she wanted to leave and spoke to her husband on three occasions, and he made excuses.After talking to her husband and him not listening, the woman moved out and began divorce proceedings. She moved closer to her family and planned to raise what she found out to be her daughter around her many cousins. Reddit users were happy that the woman finally got out of the toxic situation.
What would you do if you were in the woman’s shoes? Would you divorce your husband while pregnant, or do you think you stay and try to make it work?
This woman’s mother-in-law never even got to see her gender reveal because of her behavior. However, a mother-in-law who did was then chastised for ruining the moment.