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Breaking: Elon Musk Challenges Whoopi Goldberg to a Cage Fight Match, Shifting Focus from Zuck

August 23, 2023August 23, 2023

In an unforeseen twist that only adds to the never-ending saga of tech giant escapades, Elon Musk, the mind behind Tesla and SpaceX, has announced a shift in battle plans. Fresh off the heels of his withdrawal from the much-hyped cage fight with Meta’s Mark Zuckerberg, Musk has found a new and rather unexpected opponent: none other than the legendary actress and comedian Whoopi Goldberg.

Yes, you read that correctly.

In a press conference held inside a SpaceX rocket, Musk, donning a space suit and holding a Tesla-branded boxing glove, declared his intentions. “Fighting Zuckerberg is so last week,” he proclaimed. “I’ve decided that challenging Whoopi Goldberg to a cage fight is the future. Plus, she makes me laugh, and I think it would be entertaining.”

Whoopi, for her part, seemed unfazed by the challenge. Appearing on “The View,” she calmly sipped her morning coffee and said, “Elon wants to fight me in a cage? Honey, I’ve been fighting my whole life, bring it on!” She then humorously added, “Just make sure the cage is gold, darling. I like a little glamour with my brawls.”

The proposed fight, scheduled to be held on Mars (because why not?), is already being hailed as the most unexpected event of the year. Promoters are scrambling to figure out logistics, such as how to build a cage on another planet and whether or not gravity boots would be required.

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